When you are at the beginning of a relationship or you are trying to impress the person you like, choosing the right topic to talk about with your crush is very important. Communication is crucial in any kind of relationship, and you are just starting to know each other. This means that there are things you still don’t know about him or her: is he / she easily offended? Is something he / she won’t ever joke about? Do we share the same hobbies? What’s his or her passion?
Probably you both be wondering lots of questions about each other, but at the same time, you may feel insecure or too shy. This can lead to very awkward silences. And we imagine you don’t want that, right?
What to talk about with your crush is something you have to take seriously. Choosing a good topic will make a huge difference between a long-lasting relationship and just a summer love. There will be more connection between you two and you both will feel understood.
10 topics to talk about with your crush
The past
Though it is better to focus on the present and the future, talking about the past with the girl or boy you like may be a great opportunity to know more about them or about the reasons why they are or act in a certain way. You will know a lot about their family, the place where she or he grew up or earlier relationships –and it is also a good chance to talk about yourself and open your heart! Listen carefully, remember and learn from their ex’s mistakes. And above all, be honest.
The future
This is the beginning of a possible long-lasting relationship and you imagine yourselves together forever, but it is still too soon to talk about marriage, kids or buying a house. If you do this on your first date, he/she probably will run away to another planet. Instead of that, focus on his/her dreams, goals in life or short-term plans. Maybe you have more than you think in common and you may fulfill your dreams together: traveling around the world? Practicing any extreme sport? Going to a musical festival?
Compliments
People like being liked. And they like if someone notices a new haircut, a new dress, or a new perfume. It does not matter if you are a teenage boy or girl, or a grown-up man or woman. When someone compliments you, your self-esteem improves a lot, and usually, it keeps your smile on during all day. But be careful, as there are some important “DON’TS” in this matter:
- Don’t be rude, impolite, unpleasant or creepy: avoid complimenting body parts, too.
- Don’t do it all the time or every day: it won’t mean anything at the end!
- Don’t give compliments you don’t mean: honesty is a must.
- Don’t be annoying!
Work or school/college
Everyday life is a recurrent topic to talk about with someone you like: it is easy and not awkward at all. Talking about work or studies will allow you to skip those uncomfortable silent moments of your conversation. At the same time, you’ll be able to know why he / she chose that particular career or if his/her job satisfies him/ her. This topic is an easy path to gain confidence when talking to your crush!
Family
The family has a huge influence in our lives, whether we like it or not. They are the base of our education and the reason why we do some things in a special way. They are also the ones with whom we don’t have to pretend or be someone we aren’t. So talking about family, unless they have a dysfunctional one, is a good way to enjoy a small talk and to know if his mother is very strict, if she has older brothers or if their grandparents are an important part of their lives.
Friends
They say that friends are the family that we choose. And it may be true. As a general rule, friends are a very important part of someone’s life. Friends are there for the good and bad moments, and of course, you’ll need their approval before you get serious with that girl or boy! At some point, you’ll meet them, but before that, you can enjoy talking about your or their crazy adventures!
Himself / herself (and yourself)
This may be a topic for the end of the date or even the second or third date. Talking about oneself is not easy: we don’t express our deepest feelings and emotions to the first person that talks to us, right? But anyways, if you feel that between you two there is a special connection, you can try to open your heart and see how the other reacts. In this topic, it is especially important not to be pushy and let the other talk only if they feel comfortable about it. Once you achieve this, you have already advanced several steps.
Hobbies
Hobbies and anything that someone does in their free time is very important. With this, we will discover many things, for example:
- If they spend a lot of time in their hobbies or activities.
- If they cannot leave their hobbies and it is a top priority in their lives.
- If you share any hobby in common.
- If he or she is a sports lover, a bookworm or an unstoppable traveler.
- If, even if you don’t like it, you may enjoy it within time.
Travels
It doesn’t matter if their dream is a romantic weekend in Paris, an adventure trekking in an Indonesian volcano, an all-inclusive pack in the Bahamas or a month trip to Tokyo. Everyone likes to travel, whether it is for relaxing, discovering new cultures or doing different things. This topic is very good to talk about the past travels and who knows, to plan a trip together!
More things to talk about with your crush
The topics above are the most common ones. Unless you do it in a very very bad way, it is almost impossible to do something wrong or not to have a cheerful and normal talk with your crush. Anyways, we have thought about four more topics you can talk about with someone you like once you build confidence between you two and with yourself. Let’s take a look!
Which is your favorite….?
This is a good question that can be applied to almost any topic and at any moment of the conversation. For example, you can ask about his/her favorite animal if you know he/ she is an animal lover, or about their favorite sport, favorite color (when talking about clothes), favorite movie, music, singer, song, book, poem, favorite car, football player/ team, season of the year, day of the week, subject at school… Do you see that the possibilities are infinite? Once you receive the answer you can share your own opinion and talk about the reasons why you both chose the same or different answers. Be imaginative, smile and enjoy!
Would you rather…?
Would you rather questions are not always for beginners. They are usually used to flirt with the girl or boy that keeps you awake at night, and they must be used wisely. Asking this kind of questions can be a very funny game, but you should first try to know the other person a bit more, so you can skip uncomfortable topics or questions that could ruin your date. This is an easy, cute and funny way to get to know each other.
Hate and love
Life is not just black and white, there are lots of tones of gray in the middle. However, there are things that we absolutely hate and other things that we love the most in the world. And the same happens to your crush. In this case, our recommendation is to focus on what the other person loves, as it may be risky to talk too much about something we like but may bore our crush. When talking about things you both hate, try to put it in a funny perspective, never a negative one!
Curiosities
You should familiarize yourself with the topics that you know that girl or boy enjoys the most. For example, if he is a football lover, you may read up on what’s going on or how does it work. In this way, he will feel comfortable talking more about what they like to you. Or, if she is an animal lover you may learn about some curiosities in the animal world. Anyways, we all like to learn new things, and it doesn’t even need to be related to our hobbies: did you know that if you don’t mix food with saliva you are not able to taste it? Or that 85% of plants are found in the sea? Or that Mandarin, Spanish, and English are the most spoken languages in the world?
As you can see, there are many topics you can talk about with your crush over text or in person. Keep in mind that you need to be natural and positive all the time, and moreover, you must be as honest as possible –especially if you want it to last.
Also, don’t forget to pay attention to what this boys or girl says, as you probably don’t want to mess up with any incorrect topic or comment. Be kind, stay calm and enjoy talking with the person you love!
