Since Ancient times, there have been many techniques to attract boys, girls, men and women that have changed and evolved within years. These methods have always the same basis: grab his/her attention, find out his/her interests and share what you have in common. But let’s see this step by step, as the art of seduction requires no rush at all. Today we will see how to flirt with men: be ready.
Disney has told us all our life that we have to wait for our charming prince to come and rescue us from the danger and solitude. Forget about that, as in real life you’ll have to work hard for the boy you like. If you keep standing in the same place and doing the same things, no one is going to beg for your love.
How to flirt with guys is not that difficult once you know the techniques and best advice. The best part of what we are going to tell you is that there is a big chance you can get what you want.
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Some advice before we start
- First of all, don’t be anxious for not having a boyfriend. It is ok to be alone for some time, and knowing that you can be on your own not depending on somebody else will make you stronger. Moreover, boys can see desperation and may make them run away!
- When talking about complements and makeup, we don’t have to look like a diva (or worst, like a clown). In our daily life, boys like natural girls. Despite this, it is always very attractive a good red lipstick!
- Don’t forget your physical appearance: don’t go for a walk on your pajamas!
- Never listen to your mother, aunt, grandma or friends when talking about getting a husband or boyfriend: forget about the pressure.
- You should not compare yourself with others. If they have the perfect boyfriend, good for them. Maybe they already know how to flirt with guys! Don’t worry, we will tell you everything.
Three keys for reaching success in how to flirt with guys
Smile
Yes, boys don’t like sad or constantly angry girls. Life is short and we all should be happy and thankful for just existing! If you like him and you want to attract him, smile when he looks at you from the distance and keep smiling when he talks to you.
Your physical appearance is important
Take care of your clothes, your skin, and your hair. Men don’t care if your colors are not combined, and they won’t see any difference between a wine-colored and a ruby sweater. What we mean here is that you should look nice, neat, well-dressed and natural-looking!
But never forget your charisma!
If caring for physical appearance is a must, your personality is even more important. A pretty but mean girl won’t have a big chance, but a normal and very kind woman can have a lot of success. Just try to be yourself, be funny, care for the others and don’t act stupid. And if you are not like that, maybe you should change!
Love techniques: how to flirt with men?
And here we are going to tell you our best-kept secrets in the art of love. How to flirt with a boy is different in every case, but there are several methods that can work at least in 90% of men. If you are looking for help in order to attract that boy in your class or that colleague at work, try these techniques: it never fails!
How to flirt with a boy through jealousy
Men are very territorial, they will protect you and will be defensive over their potential rivals. You can flirt with a boy by flirting with other guys, but be careful: we explain you how.
Imagine that you are attending a party and the boy you like doesn’t do anything, he seems to be ignoring you. In order to grab his attention, try to talk and laugh with other men. He will instantly feel jealous, as you won’t be paying attention to him! He’ll try to keep an eye on what you do and, eventually, he will talk to you and be as close as possible.
This works because he feels that he has to fight for your attention. You need to be natural doing this, just talking with other guys, nothing else: please do not make sexual insinuations or you will look like a crazy woman. You can also try to mention other male names in your conversations (Tim told me the other day…): you’ll see how he tries to figure out who the hell is that Tim. Scientists say that men like to compete in all fields. Love is just one more.
With this technique, you will make him realize that you are very valuable (and desirable!) and he is not the center of the world. He will be able to show his braveness and that he is worth to you.
Keep the mystery
Girls like to talk and explain everything to everybody, at least, most of them. We don’t want to say that you keep all your information for you, but try to play with when you say it. A relationship can be very long, so why should you discover everything in your first date?
You may think that sharing all feelings and life experience can make a tighter bond between you two, but he may feel like you tell everything to the whole world. Moreover, they feel intimidated when you reveal intimate secrets with them too soon.
All the thing you don’t tell, such as your ex-lovers or your closest friends, may be more seductive and effective than what you actually explain to him, which is work, hobbies and your main interests. How can you do it? For example, you can avoid telling direct answers to his private questions, letting the mystery in. He will die of curiosity!
There is no doubt that a secret increases interest. And where there is interest, there is desire. Men like to hunt and pursue difficult goals by following leads and discovering new clues. Scientifically, this curiosity increases dopamine in their brains, which makes them falling in love easily.
Remember not to keep the mystery forever: once your relationship goes on, you can share whatever you want. He will feel like he has gained your trust, and believe us, he will be proud of it!
He is not the center of your world
He may be a busy man, but you are a busy woman as well! Don’t cancel plans or schedule your week depending on his availability. Let him know that you are very comfortable with him and you love being together, but also make sure to keep some distance and do not lose your independence. So you can be together when you are not busy with work, school, friends, family, hobbies or even solo time. He cannot make the rules, and you have a life.
You can start by finishing phone conversations first saying that you have things to do, but not specifying which these things are. He doesn’t need to know everything! (Again, the mystery game). If you feel like he has for granted that you’ll see each other certain day, cancel the plan without telling why, rescheduling it for a more convenient time for you.
Then, he’ll realize he has to make an effort to be an important part of your life because he is not the center and he wants to be it, that’s for sure. His fear towards commitment will disappear.
Besides this, you will show yourself as a strong, independent and confident woman, something that men find very attractive and sexy. Being with a boy is great, but never lose your identity for him!
Try to be as close as possible
There is something that never fails when trying to flirt with a guy: physical touching. In fact, this may be the most important part of the process of seduction, as, in the end, we are all animals. If you touch him, he will immediately know that you are interested in him, and maybe he’ll answer positively –or maybe not, who knows? But be careful, as there are many ways of “touching” and there are many different situations.
You should start creating a kind and friendly environment by putting your hand on his shoulder or slightly give pats on his back, nothing special nor aggressive. This is a soft way to engage a potential lover: you gain his trust by light physical approach as if you were just friends. From here, we must pay attention, as an impropriate touching may result fatidical and can lead to a rejection.
Next step is grabbing his wrist or touch his forearm. If at this point he doesn’t feel uncomfortable, you can confirm that you are on the right path. The ultimate physical movement (before sex, of course) is touching his face. A light touch on his chick is very romantic, and if he answers with a smile (or if you are lucky, with a kiss), it means that this way of flirting with a boy has been completely successful. You just need to be patient!
Listen to what he says
Conversation is one of the most important parts of flirting, as a pretty face can be attractive at first, but if you can’t handle a proper talk, he may quickly lose interest in you. First of all, we feel attracted to those people with whom we share hobbies or interests, or maybe those with whom we totally disagree but with whom we can have a very nice chat and discussion.
Furthermore, talking is not just an exchange of words. When we talk to another person, we can receive many non-verbal signs that he likes you, and the same happens the other way round. In a first date, when there is a lot of good conversation, it is a very good sign, as both of you feel comfortable talking to each other. On the other hand, when there is too many silence, it may seem that you don’t have a lot in common.
Anyways, if you are flirting with that guy, make sure you listen to him. Girls tend to talk a lot, especially if they like the other person, and sometimes they forget to listen as well. Let him talk about his job, his life and successes. He needs to feel important to you and, even if it doesn’t look like that, he needs to express his feelings as well. Give him some time and you will be surprised!
And relax!
This does not only apply to the art of flirting. In order to do a good job or to pass an exam, we must be relaxed and feel good about ourselves. This is even more important when we are trying to seduce the boy we like. Nervousness may lead to:
- Babbling
- Sweating
- Tremors
- Stupidity
- Wrong questions
- Worries
Etcetera. And do you really think those things are attractive to men? Even if you believe that may seem cute, it does not. It is the reflection of insecurity and immaturity. You are a grown up woman, so look in the mirror and convince yourself that you can get the man that you want, no matter what!
Let yourself go with the moment. Don’t worry by wondering all the time if he is into you, if he wants to marry, if he wants kids or if he wants you only for one night. What does it matter? If you put too much pressure on him or you show that you are uncomfortable because of your doubts, it may turn to be a disaster date.
